Tighter Than Thou

Once upon a time, there was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work.
One day, as he was walking along the shore, he looked down the beach and saw a human figure moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself at the thought of someone who would dance to the day, and so, he walked faster to catch up.
As he got closer, he noticed that the figure was that of a young man, and that what he was doing was not dancing at all. The young man was reaching down to the shore, picking up small objects, and throwing them into the ocean.
He came closer still and called out "Good morning! May I ask what it is that you are doing?"The young man paused, looked up, and replied "Throwing starfish into the ocean.""I must ask, then, why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?" asked the somewhat startled wise man.To this, the young man replied, "The sun is up and the tide is going out. If I don't throw them in, they'll die."
Upon hearing this, the wise man commented, "But, young man, do you not realize that there are miles and miles of beach and there are starfish all along every mile? You can't possibly make a difference!"
At this, the young man bent down, picked up yet another starfish, and threw it into the ocean. As it met the water, he said, "It made a difference for that one."
by Loren Eiseley, The Star Thrower 1978

KISA kind of proudly tells people I am a bit of a tightwad. Tighter than a fish's ...er something. I haven't always been that way, when I was younger I spent money like the rest of 'em. But circumstances pulled me up about 15 years ago and after a while it became a bit of a habit. In more recent years, I have become a little more environmentally aware, and after Jess's illness my priorities shifted quite drastically. So now I am frugal (my choice of word or 'canny' - the Scots version is good too) by choice. The reason is that by being frugal with the things that don't matter, we can spend the money on the things that do. Strangely enough the things that do matter are not often found in shops and restaurants. The things that do matter seem to be walking around on legs. And the other reason is that by being frugal, we are being green. It is also better for your health. They call it the green triangle. Save money, save the planet, save your health. All interconnected.

Of course frugality is relative. Our version of frugal could be seen as too spendy by some people or too extreme by others. It is all relative to where the observer is and to where we have come from.

Like all sensible married couples, we gave the control of the money to the tightest one. KISA jokes he needs to put a business plan together to purchase new stuff, usually technical stuff that we NEED. This plan falls down sometimes for two reasons. 1. KISA should be selling stuff as he is good at presenting a case. And 2. I am just a soft touch where he is concerned. So like all sensible married couples, a fair bit of compromise goes on. I would take this frugality thing a lot further, but we need to do this at KISAs pace, not mine.

Lately though, generally KISA is changing his money thinking and is also thinking a lot like me. In fact sometimes he is quite 'tighter than thou' and pulls me up when I get too spendy sometimes. His motivations are maybe different than mine but earlier retirement is one mutual one we have.
Generally though, despite our living on one income and the GFC, which admittedly has hardly impacted on our region, which is booming due to coal, (an irony that is not lost on me) we are doing OK. We still have a mortage, the bane of my life, but we are ahead on it and have no other debt. We save a little each month too, despite a few unexpecteds this year. And since we are still clawing our way back from financial backsliding from the time of Jess's illness, we are doing very well. And being canny is a big factor in that.
Some of the things we do now:

1. Recycle - the council makes it easy to do this but it is an area where we could do more. I wish there was a computer recycling centre here as we toss a lot of broken computer bits and pieces. KISA still fixes other people's dud computers. We reuse a lot of things, and mostly don't replace anything until it is broken and unfixable. Even computer parts. I still want a worm farm though.

2. No more paper towels - I overlocked squares of old towels for mopping sweaty brows and kitchen clean ups, then they get washed. Fried food can be drained on a couple of bread slices. Really nasty messes can have a rag sacrificed - they are rags after all! We also use cloth napkins at the table.

3. Cook nearly most foods from scratch - this is where we save the most money, we hardly ever buy ready prepared food. The guide is if my great grandmother wouldn't recognise it, leave it on the shelf. It helps a lot that cooking is a great passion of mine. Some people hate it! The next step for me is vegetables in the garden and chickens. Still working on KISA for that.

4. We eat in. We even prefer our food to that in restuarants these days. And we can drink a better class of wine with it at home. This is even easier since it is just the 2 of us. Or perhaps we are just getting old!

5. Wash in cold water and dry on the line. Our climate is a plus here. Except for dust storms. And rain. And massive humidity. Ok, so I do use the drier occasionally. Or the clothes get smelly.

6. Replaced most of our cleaning products with bi carb soda and vinegar and rags. Nothing cleans the cooktop better. Though I am afraid oven cleaner still needs to be used but that is only infrequently. VERY infrequently..;-) Making my own soap is next to try and laundry detergent when this box runs out.

7. We bought a coffee machine recently and now make our own coffee instead of driving through Maccas. We can have skim milk, and we only pay 60cents a cup instead of $3. This will save us lots. It is one of our bad habits financially.

8. I go to the op shops for fabric and patterns while I relearn how to sew. If something I make is a disaster it is not such a heartbreak. I often find good clothes there too. And wine glasses.

9. Since I don't work (for money) most of these things are easier for me as I have time, I find that when I do work, more expensive shortcuts get taken, especially in the supermarket and kitchen and we eat out more. I can almost create a small wage for myself with the money it is not necessary to spend to support me working.

10. I don't drive much these days so only refuel the car about once each 6 weeks. Have even entertained the thought of getting rid of it and using my bicycle. Will wait till the wet season to see if that is really a good idea!

11. I try to give back to the community by volunteering. I work a full day a week for the Leukaemia Foundation because they gave to us. I deliver Meals on Wheels once a fortnight with M. Sometimes we are the only people these folk see all day.

12. We stopped looking at advertising. We record all the TV we watch and skip the ads . I also stopped reading magazines. Count how many pages of ads are in one compared to editorial content. You will be shocked. Considering what they cost. Surprisingly not seeing advertising makes a huge difference to the creation of desire for stuff.

13. We discovered camping is more fun than mini breaks in other towns/cities. And much more relaxing.

14. We stopped going to the shopping centres. Unless we need to buy food. Or something we need. If you don't see it you don't want it. This really works.

15. Because I don't work outside the home I can support and pamper KISA. He works long days for us and when he comes home he can just collapse, and he has a happy stress free home. I like doing this and do it by choice. It works for us. I understand it is not everyones cup of tea though.

16. Opting out. We really have become an economy rather than a society. We are now consumers where once we were citizens. The only time we have another label is at election time when we are voters. Well, I want to be a member of a community. So I am trying to opt out of the consumer culture. It is not bloody easy either I tell you, they are out to get us everywhere. They want our money.

17. We just want a simple life. But living simply is hard work! Trying not to let your money sift through your fingers is hard work. Beating the advertisers and the pervailing attitudes keeps you on your toes. But it is worth it and very satisfying.

Everyone is different and a simpler life looks differnet for different people. Everybodys' priorities are different. And whether we are referring to money or time, the principle is the same. Cut back on what doesn't matter to enable more for what does.

Ghandi said "Be the change you want in the world". We won't make much of a difference to the environment and the world with what we do, but as the little story above says, it all helps a little, and it will make a difference in ours and our childrens' lives. This keeps me going even when I do feel like I am swimming upstream.